*counting faces*

continuing yesterday's headlines: the-very-smart-chem-teacher blews his top and went hysterical

i mean seriously, how many teachers you see speak in a possibly deranged and incoherent way. he commits so many fallacies. an absolutely impossible guy. i really want to speak good of him but it is really not happening...he seems to constantly place himself in a difficult position where most would just regard him as a monster and HATE him, disregarding his efforts at the same time. i mean..it is just in the package--everyone sensors out your good and highlights your bad.

it just happens. with his shockingly low EQ. his just suffers at the end of the day. sometimes i feel like strangling him because he would have been respected and well-liked for his hardworking nature if he had not portrayed himself as the insensitive freak.

hai...the long and short about the chemistry remedial....

the very smart chem teacher: (to me and chem consultation friend) whoa..you two are the ULTIMATE. one five marks and one eight marks. one get one-eighth of the marks. one get one-fifth of the marks. i really don't know how arh.

turning to me.....

the very smart chem teacher: tell me. did you study or not?? entire ionic equilibria question blank! i mean seriously, if you are not interested. please don't waste my time. come for consultation still score this kind of marks.

me: i didn't study. i just studied carbonyl.
i laughed. hohoho. it was very wrong as he seemed really pissed.

the very smart chem teacher: you only studied carbonyl. you think what. class test arh? what is this?

me: common test lor.
hohoho! (i am seriously hopeless--still can laugh after being lectured)

the very smart chem teacher: common test right?? then? carbonyl is only one of the topics. luckily the question is on carbonyl or else you won't even get 8 marks. and you, did you study?

chem consultation friend: yes i studied very hard.
she studied extremely hard and was dead serious about this.

the very smart chem teacher: you always say you studied very hard. but your results don't show! you really got study or not. don't deceive yourself leh. you said you got study but if in actual fact you didn't, you are actually putting yourself at a great disavantage.
see? he is doing himself a great disservice again. he is trying to help. but the approach! please the very smart chem teacher!!!

chem consultation friend: yes i really got study. it's just that i can read lecture notes and understand but when it's the actual, i cannot do.

the very smart chem teacher: still babbling away and being skeptical.... then i don't know how to help you. how you study. i think i should stand beside you during mid-years to see how you do your exams. what the??? ouch. that hurts!!! and the approach!!!!

to me: and you arh...i don't bother about you already. whether you want to study or not it's your problem. you are going to suffer if you don't.
hohoho. i can't believe my attitude.

the very smart chem teacher is seriously unsound at this moment. is mental instability his medical condition? he started scolding random people.
it feels like the case where your anger is at epitome and you need to explode...you'll turn from anger to hysteria. at least that was what happened to my chem teacher.

he stopped the guy and asked us: is he a boy or a girl?
stupid question as it is downright obvious.

being my usual rude self: of course boy lah, so obvious.

chem teacher wents crazy:
boy, you boy or girl?
yah your hair.
when are you going to cut it?
better remember to cut it.

hey people, whatever the boy said didn't really matter. what mattered was what the very smart chem teacher said. did you guys get this?

he is a chem teacher. he is not in the disciplinary committee. he is not in PE deparment who is in charge of all these attire stuff....he is possibly deranged now. perhaps he was too devastated and affected by us.

argh the very smart chem teacher. i really hope you would FOR ONCE use the correct approach!!!! it will immediately aid you in your image!!!! completely.




day 2
apparently i was wrong again. he pasted a post-it in chem consultation friend's file and said she had incomplete work and that she did not mark her work( implying that she got all correct). i rolled my eyes. the very smart chem teacher just had to make things worse. he is devastating the already strickened relationship. yes, he is trying to help. but the approach!

APPROACH
APPROACH
APPROACH

i feel very sorry towards him. and to me, i really hate myself for this...but...i didn't hand in the file today.

all hail,
counting faces

okay, first i have to highlight various issues. one thing, i am really addicted to blogging, so much that i am going to post an extremely long post today:) so please DO NOT COMPLAIN or even try to be sarcastic on the fact that i like blogging, especially mrs weeseng, who seems to find pleasure in my cbox. yet another huge problem arises...why do people in my life love to IMPERSONATE OTHERS. mrs weeseng, you should have learnt by now. you are not mengyuan. so stop this delusional behaviour. and to sectional leader. huanglaoshi seems incapable of surfing the net or should i say using the computer. remember his little ordeal with the computer? hohoho! challenging indeed!

*counting faces*

OH MY GOD! what a month! now, i finally have the time to sit around and blog about my roller-coaster life. it is interesting, joyous, exhilarating, intriguing, emotional, depressing, discouraging, yet anticipating and hopeful! it is just simply fantastic. my mood is constantly fluctuating with the different events that occured or everything i had encountered in the past month. therefore, it is deserving of its name: my roller-coaster life.

my roller-coaster life begun in mid-april when the intensives for the SYF started. practice! practice! practice! we had yet to condition ourselves to the competition mode. almost everybody played the pieces without any passion. what we had were tired mind body and soul.
we faced the greatest pressure in expectations. in self-expectations, the expectations of the teachers, the school and the alumni. we have to uphold our reputation. this is enough to stress everyone out. it cripples everytime we do not play well. this is the depressing and discouraging part. 'not good enough' seems to be a spirit that haunts and you'll shiver and crumble. at least it does for me. for a few others with a strong heart, the supposedly discouragements in my eyes turn into motivation--a driving force which pushes them further.
really, sometimes, i have to admit that it is true that people react differently to a same situation. i am more pessimistic. sad to say.

these are one of my darkest days, where i am stressed up to the brim that tears flowed uncontrollably. tear duct= tap.


my roller coaster life turns itself 360 degrees. the kind that will make you puke and scream you head off. this is an extremely truthful recount as we really did scream our head off when the results are released.

huang lao shi is right. smile to give your comrades confidence. we are together not alone. it boosts confidence. and it works like magic. huanglaoshi is forever right.

we went up the stage, focused yet enjoying the music that we made..literally the music that we made: "wo men zhi zhuo de yin yue". we are there to showcase our talents and put together our best performance. every beat, every second, is symbolic of all our hard work and effort. i really cannot describe in words the amount of effort we placed as a group. we flowed with the music, we immersed ourselves into the world without words, in a world where music reigns and is the language. we believed deeply in huanglaoshi and stayed calm. nervousness maybe present in some, but we believe the jitters push us to be more careful and more serious in the act. we loved OUR MUSIC. OUR CONFIDENCE. which huanglaoshi calls it "xiao xin de zi xin". careful confidence--the direct translation if you want.

it was really the NEVER FELT BEFORE. the feeling was novel, exhilarating and it devoured us. we were so absorbed. i was sooo proud of everyone.

we really have to thank our teachers, our seniors, huanglaoshi, the exco and one another. hey, i am not diplomatic here, but after a particular incident, i really feel the impact of co being built on such strong foundations, such strong grounds.

mr lim: anderson junior college...rong.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

needless to explain right?



my roller coaster ride becomes rocky when i faced a confrontation. which i reacted badly as usual and made the situation worse. speechless then.

i realised that my joy seems to be to over-the-top and my excitement seemed offensive to my very very good friend whom i knew worked very hard for her CCA but did not get the desirable results.

i was being insensitive and unthinking. i was deeply affected and went ranting the entire day.
only till dinnertime when i had the chance to calm myself down and reflect did i find myself ridiculously mean and unfeeling. i didn't want the friendship to end.

i apologised.

sometimes, i really feel like slapping myself awake because my character flaws are soo evident.


Another reason to really slap myself

i made another friend angry AGAIN.
imagine. peaceful dinner at kfc turning into a heated argument and swan walks off.
and it's all because of tan. i mean, it's not even us.

but now you see why i really feel like slapping myself sometimes after everything occured.

an excerpt of the should-not-have-been-there conversation.

swan: so you think very good lah, understand tan so well. why you always siding her.

me:no....(right answer) yes.....(wrong answer). yes. not i siding her but she wants the best for us.

swan: so you think you are always right lah?

me, possibly deranged: yes. i am always right.

why do i have to be so adamant and irritating and didactic and rude. perhaps a 'i guess that's me'?-- sounds so irresponsible and unthinking.

stunningly, it is really not about us. as in we are not even the subjects of concern.

i apologised again only to receive hostility. i sent again. no reply.
i was afraid..is our friendship really going to end because of this. it is so not going to suffer.
mon. did not attend school.

IS SHE STILL ANGRY?

i decided to send another sms to settle our disputes. no reply. finally. finally. finally. i received a sms which explicity spelled that she was not mad at me already.

doesn't it call for celebration???
IT is really time for me to change:)

LASTLY IT'S VERY-SMART-CHEM-TEACHER. again. shall dedicate one post to him. he really does seem to have a flair for making others mental and unnerved.


all hail,
counting faces